Stories from parenthood with Alexandra Sochowski
Getting to know Alexandra
Communications consultant and content creator
FW: Give us a glimpse into your career and how it looked in the years leading up to the pandemic?
Alexandra: Prior to having kids I was a communications specialist in both the public and private sector. After having my second child, I decided to go freelance so that I could be home with my boys during their early years.
FW: Can you summarize what your journey into parenthood looked like ?
Alexandra: I never saw myself as the stay-at-home or work-from-home type. I love the atmosphere and energy of collaborative work. Having the boys changed me though and being a mom and being there for both the big and little moments in their lives brought me so much joy and fulfillment. After having my second baby I realized just how fast time goes and that I’d never get these years back, so I made the decision to work around them.
FW: What does your current work/life situation look like balancing parenthood and your career?
Alexandra: Working from home with two wild boys wasn’t easy pre-Covid. Doing it during a pandemic became even harder. The majority of my work has to be done after they go to bed, so the days are long.
Parenting through the pandemic
FW: What does a typical day for you look like right now?
Alexandra: A typical day for me starts pretty early, the boys are up around 6/6:30. If I’m feeling motivated I try to squeeze in a workout while they’re eating breakfast, otherwise I use that time to catch up on emails. The majority of the day is spent playing with them and doing things around the house. Once they go to bed around 8, I try to get in a couple of hours of work.
FW: How have you managed balancing your workload in a time when childcare has been sometimes unavailable or sporadic?
Alexandra: They boys don’t go to daycare and because of covid I haven’t been able to use my parents as babysitters. I know technically I could take the boys there as childcare is allowed, but my mom works in the emergency department at the hospital, so it’s not something any of us felt comfortable with. So, the last year has been tough. I’ve had no childcare, no great outlet for the boys’ energy (and there’s a lot of energy when they’re 3&4) and a lot of late nights trying to get everything done. We’ve made it work, but obviously it’s less than ideal.
FW: What supports and/or resources have made it possible for you to take on both career and child-rearing responsibilities? And what have been some of the biggest challenges or changes to your work life since the start of the pandemic?
Alexandra: My husband has been a big help getting stuff done around the house and with the boys when he’s not working himself. Honestly I’ve had to just take on less work in order to manage life. It’s not ideal, but when I try to “do it all” I’m just in a constant state of stress and exhaustion. These first years, when the boys are so dependent on me need to be more about them than my career. I work when I can, squeezing in emails and photo editing during quiet time or tv time. Instead of watching tv at night I work. There’s weeks where everything starts piling up and I get overwhelmed and then there’s weeks where I’ve struck that ever-elusive balance. I feel like as moms we just figure it out, we’ve got superpowers like that, I guess.
FW: Has the pandemic impacted how you parent your child/ren?
Alexandra: Covid completely changed the way I parent. I’m not the mom who loves to play toys and make believe. I barely played that way as a child from what I’ve heard. I love to do things. Pre-covid I was out of the house five or six days a week with the kids going to play dates, the museum, science centres, indoor playgrounds etc. We were rarely home and I loved it. The past year has been physically and mentally exhausting. We’ve followed the rules, so there’s been no playing inside with friends, no sports, no weekends at the grandparents. The boys have been bored and under-stimulated. We’ve gotten through it, we’ve found new ways to have fun and pass the day, but I’m not going to lie, it’s been my toughest year parenting yet and I’m more than excited for things to get back to normal.
FW: Has the pandemic positively impacted your career/life in any way?
Alexandra: Not everything about the last year has been negative though! My husband has been working from home as well, so we’ve gotten to see and spend so much more time with him, which has been amazing. I always say it, but these are years we’ll never get back. Time is priceless and the one thing that covid has given us is time, and for that I’m grateful.